Post Hawaiian tsunami day

 

Haleluya!

A day after a tsunami warning feels as a day after Christmas Eve or Old year’s eve to me.
Weird isn’t it! True that’s how I feel. It is like all little worries are nothing compared with the danger of a wave coming over your head. When the danger ebbs away, it feels like you have been granted to continue this PRECIOUS life. The worries of yesterday mean nothing anymore…worry free…
That’s what we, the collective, grand ourselves to do on days like Christmas and New Years day.
They even stop wars and then continue the next day…J No worries on Christmas and New Year!
LOL…we get permission to get a day off…after that we do need to go in our box again! J

Ye…so that’s probably why I am singing Christmas carols today…J

When you get a warning like that, nothing that was in your head that was important before that warning, really seems so silly in that moment.
I kind of observed myself yesterday and I am truly proud to say that I experienced myself for the first time as myself this time.
What I want to say with this is, this is my 3th or 4^th tsunami warning and I was here with the earthquake and all these years I thought I had a panicking Nature. It is NOT true!

I was always with other people during these other warnings. This time I was on my own and I was so peaceful as I can be. It showed me how much I was OR changed OR not influenced by others fear anymore! So probably changed and therefore not influenced anymore by others fear.
(thank you mama-P)

I had a friend of facebook texting me and showed concern etc…and I was watching myself, I didn’t trap in the invitation to go in panic.

The last tsunami warnings were like: panicking disasters!
Now I can see that wasn’t me anymore! Good to see and to know. J

I didn’t start packing food, I didn’t drive to the gas station as crazy, I didn’t fill up water bottles, I didn’t put my belongings in a safe place, I didn’t fled up the mountain,…
I didn’t do any of those things.

The only thing I did was, walking in my home deciding what I would take with me if I had to go and very quickly I decided that was packing my laptop, my art bag and my Mama-P.books.
My snorkel gear was in my car and if I had to go, ‘Rockie’ my car was going to bring me; so I was ready to go. That was it. I was done in 5 minutes. J

Then I just relaxed and watched the news and a movie.

There were silly moments I was thinking;”What if I have just my snorkel gear on and when the wave comes I go and swim with dolphins”…J ye silly moments I have …J

The neighbors just across me had a party going on and that was the vibration I was in this tsunami this time…

No fear… Nothing to do then to let happen what was going to happen anyway…

Oh….so I was in my feeling of Christmas. NO-THING to DO!!!! Just RELAXING!
ALLOWING myself to just enjoy and DO NOTHING without having any guilt…
I am ‘working’ J on being guilt-free all the time…J it’s not always ’WORKING’ yet! J

I REALLY want to leave this life of guilt behind, day after day, one little foot in front of the other…but I am not always succeeding. I am so used to my mind that says I HAVE TO WORK…that not working feels uncomfortable and even worse it feels UNSAFE.
If feels as if I wouldn’t keep WORKING or DOING I would end up on the street.
Working is taught to be necessary to have a roof over our head or have food in our stomach…
Well, whatever you put in the field (space of God) is going to proof that YOU ARE right!
So….it is important to me and for everyone what we are communicating with the field/God.

It is weird but this post tsunami day brings everything so much in perspective.
What is life and death, right?

This morning a lot of the beaches were closed because of a shark attack yesterday…
It brought me in a place of true GRATITUDE for my life.
I allowed myself to really be in the NOW and to feel there is ONLY One now.
I also came into the place of true REALITY.

I was so thankful for my life and was aware it could be over in a sec.
You know… tsunami…shark…

I was driving behind a car and I wanted that it would go faster than it was going…
I was hot and wanted to get in the water…
As ‘Iam’ I suddenly saw this nagging thought coming into my peaceful field of gratitude…J
I didn’t push it away… I just watched it…
I saw and felt how heavy that THOUGHT was…what a judgment…why wanting to have it faster than it was going?
All was well…and ‘hup’(=means in Dutch in an instance) something shifted dramatically…!!!!!!!!

I assure you in that moment I dropped the story of how things SHOULD be and I came in the GRATITUDE of how things were!
And I saw the red color of the truck lightening up and I saw the dog’s radiance and happiness.

He was standing in the back of the truck, enjoying his day out with his master.(he must have had a Christmas feeling too, I could just sense it J)
I saw the lava rocks shining in the sun,
I saw the paved road that was so kind to let me drive on it,
I saw the blue sky shining in this post tsunami ‘doing nothing’ day,
I felt the warm air on my skin,
I felt the stillness of life and I saw this was all a movie..

I mean by this I could see awareness behind all of this…

I could see the true space of life.

 I was not NAMING anything with eyes that were viewing it with judgment,

I was just OBSERVING the things that were coming in front of me as they are…

Red truck, with no attachment,
happy dog, with no attachment,
Road, with no attachment…

NO STORY in my head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What a LIBERATION!!!

 

It was the same feeling I had as when I walked in Safe way the other day. (see other blog)
I felt so huge and so vibrant and so spacious.
And all what I saw was just beautiful. REALITY was BEAUTIFUL. ALL of it!
No judgments of good or bad…

The guy didn’t have to drive any faster, I was enjoying the true ride of LIFE!!!!
I was the awareness and all those amazing creations were appearing in my world responding on who I was.

 

I had it for about 15 minutes, because my thoughts went to a decision I had to make.
Grrrr…still am letting myself slip away…J
Mama-P. already told me millions of times (she must have a deep well of inexhaustible patience)…
and I should have know already she is always right…hahaJ

What if nothing is wrong what she says, right?
This is a funny use of her famous phrase; “What if nothing is wrong?”
HAA!

So Mama-P-JI already explained me that decisions never really have to be made. If you relax into what you want to BE, everything just flows and it is kind of all falling into place without doing any effort…

The only job I have is BEING…

Dawn I forgot that for a minute…
So I was stressing a little…shall I do this or that…

My friends were driving towards the beach where the shark attack took place because they wanted to swim there. They invited me to come with them. They kind of wanted to see the shark.
Hmmm, I asked them;”Are you not afraid?”
No they weren’t.
I thought that was brave.
Also they said that it would be gone by now.
And they had a point.

So I was kind of THINKING it would be good for me to just go through the fear and swim there so I am through it…J

What thinking can do, right..?

So in that moment I didn’t see the beauty of the red of the truck anymore, or the dogs beautiful face in the back of the truck, the beautiful fuchsia red flowers on the road, the palm trees green and yellow waving in their gorgeous being…

I HAD to make a very HEAVY decision…’hup’ right there…
It all became so heavy and my body felt as if I was a little tiny gnome having to reach just above the steering wheel to see where to drive… my spacious feeling of my true SELF was gone (with the wind J)

I was driving to Makena landing and suddenly I pass my friends who were driving in the opposite direction…
“What?”

One of them my friends rolled down his window and said;
“Beach closed, I can’t believe it, just for that little nibble they took out of that woman.”
Waaaw, I didn’t want to be that woman and I send her a lot of love and compassion.

Ok it showed me I still was afraid of sharks…but maybe it is just wise to have fear of sharks and it shows the gratitude I show for my life on Earth. It doesn’t really stop me, so I guess it can be wise sometimes to have fear…

But here we go…Mama-P. was right, huh… Damned…BEACH CLOSED…
Haha…The Universe had responded on what I really wanted…

I didn’t had to choose…it all worked out… J
I could turn back and drive to the place I really wanted to be…
I remembered she said…

BE THE ONE and the Universe takes care of it…J

I drove back in the serene peacefulness of before and I swam…with caution, stayed close to the reef, didn’t go far out in the deep ocean! And I had the honor to have three eagle rays joining me!

With an immense grace they were resting close to the surface of the water and they let me just close near them. In the beginning the two little ones rushed away and went somewhere else and I just floated with the big one. His head was as big as a soccer ball, his eyes so small in his/her cute big face…
her nose is so cute….(let’s say it is a she)

The longer I was floating with her the more she trusted me and she would soar underneath me, next to me and I was just observing the beauty of the pattern of her wings. It was as if an artist had made some dots and circles in white on top of her black wings.
I could see that at her shoulder blades the patterns was really carefully painted in an amazing harmony. God is so a magnificent creator!

Her wings or fins went slow up and down, so slowly, so peaceful. I knew she was kind of sleeping, or in a blissful state. She would soar above the coral and wing around it as an eagle that sees it all with closed eyes. I was wondering if they have a sonar system as the dolphins have. Mmmm,

I am so blessed lately…dolphins, turtles, eagle rays….

I saw her breathing very calmly …just soaring…magnificent…
Then after about 10 minutes the two little ones must have felt I wasn’t the bad ‘eagle ray’ eating monster and just soared next and under me with her as well.

Three eagle rays floating, it was so an amazingly magnificent serene vibration.
I remembered that the Hawaiians call the rays ‘GRACEFUL Strength’
Delicious.

They were doing their thing and I left them in their peacefulness and swam further and saw one of my fellow soul travelers; the HONU.
It is now a whole while when I connect with them and they want it, they respond to my voice…or whatever they respond too-I don’t have a clue…
They give me a clear recognition that they want to be pet.
Yes, I call it petting now. They present their shell and…maybe I am the cleaning lady…LOL…

And it is not petting, but cleaning…

Anyway they are such sensitive beings!

Their shell is extremely sensitive! It is as our skin, so sensitive they are…it sounds weird, but it is.

This turtle was on the surface breathing and then dove underneath me just where I could gently touch her. And she stayed there forever hanging. She didn’t really come to the surface, but she kept swimming forever just this 20 cm underneath me having her beauty clean. I could tell at the mimic of her face…yes I see all faces in the ocean...I love to I say it like that...I kind of see their enjoinment in the look of their eyes. Each turtle has different eyes. It is so beautiful!

It was a true blessing and honor to be having her give me this attention!J

The water was so gorgeous, so warm…it was delicious…
I came out of the water and a man, a tourist came out too and kind of looked at me and I said;
”It’s like you want to say something.”

Because he was moving his mouth and things were kind of coming out, but not really and he just looked at me and he said;
”Oh man, we could have been in Wichita right now.”
“Waaw”, I respond,”How amazing is that, you are not. You are in Maui.”
“Ye’, and again he said, this is ssoooo nice! We could have been in Wichita!”
He was so in gratitude…kind of the same what I was feeling…

And he continued;’ Where are you from? Australia?”
(that says me… my accent is not so bad anymore. Or is an Australia accent considered a disaster? hahaJ)

 

“No”, I said, “I live her, but originally I am from Belgium.”
“Oh my’, he said, “You are so lucky! You could have been in Belgium right now!!!”
“Waaw”, I said, “True. I am happy am not. I love it here!”

Never thought about that…Well I guess I didn’t have to, you can’t be somewhere else then where you are, right?
But it was a great thought to have the feeling of gratitude…J

Sometimes we need to have tsunami warnings, shark warnings, ‘inside Soul calling’ warnings to wake us up to let us know HOW precious life is on Earth.
And to show us that heaven is here…

And now…while I am typing…while you are reading… J
ENJOY!

Love tamara rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com