I just ate a chocolate croissant, like I was used to in Belgium
when I was little. My friend M. surprises me, FORTUNATELY ( I love that word,
lot of FORTUNE in it!) frequently with that amazing surprise.
I am off sugar, but I make an exception for ‘my’ croissant. In Belgium called a chocolate cookie, chocoladekoek.
Ye, she kind of teases me to give it to the hungry birds and mice in the bay. But I make sure they are fat and fulfilled with my never ending peanuts that I share with them. It is my survival food. It takes so fast the hunger away. I always have it with me, my survival kit.
When she hands me the treasure I even hide it for her, you never know who she will feed with it! J
haha..
I wait for about 3 hours to eat it. Even when I come out of the water and I am super hungry, I can keep it for when I have my coffee with it.
My mind goes to the little white bag and the crispy chocoladekoek…but lucky me, I deliberately put it in the back of my car, so I can’t reach it when I am driving. J I know myself to good already…J
And the good news is I start liking myself. It is good to be with me…J
Today was a heavenly day in the water, as usual. You always get surprised. Anything can show up!
A few days ago it were 3 sharks, today I was distracted by a boat entering the reserve.
Thinking about Wai’ha, my beloved turtle (see other blog from a few months ago) that I tried to save after he was hit by a boat…I started screaming and yelling towards the boat. No response.
I was far at the point snorkeling with my friend B., the water was so beautiful turquoise, the sunrays going into the Ocean and lightening up all the coral and amazingly water-life.
I announced:”We should swim towards the boat.”
But looking at it, it was far and we just came from that side…so far.
No reaction from B. She is my savior buddy, she is over 70 and man she swims fast and long!!!
B. was not moving and so I heard myself saying;
“I should swim to the boat.”
I started following it, having Wai’ha in my memories and my new friend Pinky, whom I didn’t write about yet. (my beloved Pinky is a baby turtle)
And I was thinking about all the other turtles not used to a boat above their head…
They were heading turtle town and I know turtles are hanging at the surface there. So I started to push my body some more…
After a while I stopped and yelled again… “You are in the reserve, no boats allowed!”
Oef, finally the captain or whatever he was saw me and yelled something back that obviously meant;
“I don’t understand you and therefore I will just continue and who are you to tell me anything.”
Something like that…
I am off sugar, but I make an exception for ‘my’ croissant. In Belgium called a chocolate cookie, chocoladekoek.
Ye, she kind of teases me to give it to the hungry birds and mice in the bay. But I make sure they are fat and fulfilled with my never ending peanuts that I share with them. It is my survival food. It takes so fast the hunger away. I always have it with me, my survival kit.
When she hands me the treasure I even hide it for her, you never know who she will feed with it! J
haha..
I wait for about 3 hours to eat it. Even when I come out of the water and I am super hungry, I can keep it for when I have my coffee with it.
My mind goes to the little white bag and the crispy chocoladekoek…but lucky me, I deliberately put it in the back of my car, so I can’t reach it when I am driving. J I know myself to good already…J
And the good news is I start liking myself. It is good to be with me…J
Today was a heavenly day in the water, as usual. You always get surprised. Anything can show up!
A few days ago it were 3 sharks, today I was distracted by a boat entering the reserve.
Thinking about Wai’ha, my beloved turtle (see other blog from a few months ago) that I tried to save after he was hit by a boat…I started screaming and yelling towards the boat. No response.
I was far at the point snorkeling with my friend B., the water was so beautiful turquoise, the sunrays going into the Ocean and lightening up all the coral and amazingly water-life.
I announced:”We should swim towards the boat.”
But looking at it, it was far and we just came from that side…so far.
No reaction from B. She is my savior buddy, she is over 70 and man she swims fast and long!!!
B. was not moving and so I heard myself saying;
“I should swim to the boat.”
I started following it, having Wai’ha in my memories and my new friend Pinky, whom I didn’t write about yet. (my beloved Pinky is a baby turtle)
And I was thinking about all the other turtles not used to a boat above their head…
They were heading turtle town and I know turtles are hanging at the surface there. So I started to push my body some more…
After a while I stopped and yelled again… “You are in the reserve, no boats allowed!”
Oef, finally the captain or whatever he was saw me and yelled something back that obviously meant;
“I don’t understand you and therefore I will just continue and who are you to tell me anything.”
Something like that…
Ok push some more, splash splash and
Two huge eagle rays pass me in the most gracious formation.(A
really huge one and a smaller one). What a gift!
The symbolic meaning of a ray is GRACEFUL strength.
Instinctly I followed them…but then my heart shouted; “Pinky.”
Woops, I made a 45 degree turn and headed to the boat again…
Kind of talking inside myself…(mormelen= Dutch for talking inside my mouth and not being happy because I had to let go of the Eagle rays. We don’t have that word in English)
The symbolic meaning of a ray is GRACEFUL strength.
Instinctly I followed them…but then my heart shouted; “Pinky.”
Woops, I made a 45 degree turn and headed to the boat again…
Kind of talking inside myself…(mormelen= Dutch for talking inside my mouth and not being happy because I had to let go of the Eagle rays. We don’t have that word in English)
Finally I was 2 meters from them and I saw them making
themselves ready to go in the water and I repeated;
“You are in a reserve and boats are not allowed.”
I think it were 2 unaware tourists renting a boat...anyway the man kind of protested somehow with saying; “I am just going to anchor here and snorkel.”
And I just repeated;
“You are in a reserve and boats are not allowed.”
“You are in a reserve and boats are not allowed.”
I think it were 2 unaware tourists renting a boat...anyway the man kind of protested somehow with saying; “I am just going to anchor here and snorkel.”
And I just repeated;
“You are in a reserve and boats are not allowed.”
That did it. Mean time my friend B. arrived too…so more
women POWER!
“Oh well”, he said and started moving out of the reserve.
I memorized the number of the boat. My friend the ranger always told me; “It doesn’t do anything with just telling them, you have to have the number of the boat.”
I memorized the number of the boat. My friend the ranger always told me; “It doesn’t do anything with just telling them, you have to have the number of the boat.”
We waited a little and kept an eye on the boat; if it really
disappeared and we swam back to the point to continue our journey…It gave a
good feeling to be able to care for all the animals in the reserve.
“I will take care of you, Pinky!”; I thought by myself.
“I will take care of you, Pinky!”; I thought by myself.
I felt like a BIG MAMA…that’s how it feels to be a mama…I
probably have all moms on my neck now…haha J
When I am out of the water, I am off the hook…J
I was looking at the fish and the turtles and my ego was telling them;
“I took care of you guys, don’t worry!”
They were looking up to me with a face of; “Wa Ever.”
Looking with those stupid big eyes…what’s the big deal here? Who cares?
I think that the whole scene was just to let my ego feel good, as being the rescuer...the knight on the horse…tudu…. J Haha
I was looking at the fish and the turtles and my ego was telling them;
“I took care of you guys, don’t worry!”
They were looking up to me with a face of; “Wa Ever.”
Looking with those stupid big eyes…what’s the big deal here? Who cares?
I think that the whole scene was just to let my ego feel good, as being the rescuer...the knight on the horse…tudu…. J Haha
Hungry afterwards I waited until I came home to eat my
chocolate croissant, chocolade koek and it threw me back in time when I was 7
or 8 and we were with the whole family upstairs in Oostende.
In the weekends we would travel to my parents’ country house, but sometimes we stayed in Oostende and then it was feast! My grandparents lived in Brussels and every weekend they would come to Oostende. We lived in a typical house in town, which was 5 floors high. You know those old European houses. The street was named after Princes Clementine because she had lived there before. So that kind of old.
In the weekends we would travel to my parents’ country house, but sometimes we stayed in Oostende and then it was feast! My grandparents lived in Brussels and every weekend they would come to Oostende. We lived in a typical house in town, which was 5 floors high. You know those old European houses. The street was named after Princes Clementine because she had lived there before. So that kind of old.
 |
| Home where we were living, you see first floor where my dad is standing, having a exposition of his work and doing funny... |
My grandparents lived on the 4th floor and I remember that I LOVED
it when they were there.
They would spoil us with great food, such as CHOCOLATE CROISSANTS, Belgian waffles,... you can’t imagine…
I loved to be there and eat. My grandma would treat us all the time. They would take us out for lunch; they would take us to the beach…always without my parents, which I didn’t mind!
They would spoil us with great food, such as CHOCOLATE CROISSANTS, Belgian waffles,... you can’t imagine…
I loved to be there and eat. My grandma would treat us all the time. They would take us out for lunch; they would take us to the beach…always without my parents, which I didn’t mind!
J
My grandpa would take us to the go cars in ‘Little forest’ where we had a whole circuit we could ride.
Yes, today my grandparents were visiting me here in Hawaii. I miss those times, where it was so secure to have that kind of abundance.
A few months ago I would still remember the difficult times and now I look so different to life, so WITHOUT many JUDGMENT!
I see the good times and see through the bad times and see that it is all just a dream anyway.
“WA EVE!”
My grandma played in my earlier life the fairy godmother who gave me all, and at the end of her life she was bitter in losing her daughter and she became my ‘prosecutor or the wicked witch’.
My grandpa would take us to the go cars in ‘Little forest’ where we had a whole circuit we could ride.
Yes, today my grandparents were visiting me here in Hawaii. I miss those times, where it was so secure to have that kind of abundance.
A few months ago I would still remember the difficult times and now I look so different to life, so WITHOUT many JUDGMENT!
I see the good times and see through the bad times and see that it is all just a dream anyway.
“WA EVE!”
My grandma played in my earlier life the fairy godmother who gave me all, and at the end of her life she was bitter in losing her daughter and she became my ‘prosecutor or the wicked witch’.
But today I only felt love for both of them and the
awareness that they did what they did because they believed their thoughts. It
had nothing to do with their hearts, because those hearts are still there for
me. And my heart is wide open to receive them with open wings.
Forgiveness is there effortless when you see that a lot of actions in life were actions coming from believing the MIND. Once you see that you come in the heart and in the truth of life.
Forgiveness is there effortless when you see that a lot of actions in life were actions coming from believing the MIND. Once you see that you come in the heart and in the truth of life.
There is only love and NOTHING is wrong.
It doesn’t matter what happened in the past…nothing matters…
It doesn’t matter what happened in the past…nothing matters…
If you just can open your heart for REALITY…and that is that
we are all connected and LOVE.
WA EVE…happened is what needed always or it wouldn’t…
I eat my chocolate croissant and speak to my grandparents; “Meme and parrain, thank you so much for overflowing me so much with abundance and love. Thank you so much; that I have felt what it means to be truly who I Am…abundance….It wasn’t about the things you gave me…but about the heart…
thank you for the feeling of SAFETY you gave me. I know now, that I can give that to me and I will use your memory to awake that part that in me. I will open my arms to receive again, like I was fearless to open my arms to receive from you…that kind of safety is priceless! I love you and forgive me.”
I eat my chocolate croissant and speak to my grandparents; “Meme and parrain, thank you so much for overflowing me so much with abundance and love. Thank you so much; that I have felt what it means to be truly who I Am…abundance….It wasn’t about the things you gave me…but about the heart…
thank you for the feeling of SAFETY you gave me. I know now, that I can give that to me and I will use your memory to awake that part that in me. I will open my arms to receive again, like I was fearless to open my arms to receive from you…that kind of safety is priceless! I love you and forgive me.”
Love tamara rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com
www.rainbowsheart.com
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