Can’t believe it, but Mama-P. was .ucking right about those
22 days!
Mmmm…on Monday morning when I called her in all my excitement about a pod of dolphins, she asked in a normal tone…
“Which day are we?”
Mmm…my brain was kind of searching…you know like your computer scans….
Why would she want to know that? She normally doesn’t do time. Hmmm…
I know her by now well enough to know that she doesn’t make plans and lives very much in the moment. She is the one telling me over and over that I can’t THINK ahead of time, because then I am away from the NOW.
There was a silence because my brain was working HARD to give her the right answer.
It was funny to see that my brain was coming up with possible answers, but that there was some watcher in me; that was deleting every answer that appeared in that little space between my two ears.
Mmmm…on Monday morning when I called her in all my excitement about a pod of dolphins, she asked in a normal tone…
“Which day are we?”
Mmm…my brain was kind of searching…you know like your computer scans….
Why would she want to know that? She normally doesn’t do time. Hmmm…
I know her by now well enough to know that she doesn’t make plans and lives very much in the moment. She is the one telling me over and over that I can’t THINK ahead of time, because then I am away from the NOW.
There was a silence because my brain was working HARD to give her the right answer.
It was funny to see that my brain was coming up with possible answers, but that there was some watcher in me; that was deleting every answer that appeared in that little space between my two ears.
I came to the amazing conclusion on Thanksgiving Day that our thoughts appear between that little space between our ears. Well, that’s what I made of it! J And I think it is funny!
It gives me a really funny safe feeling that my thoughts have to fit in such a small space and so are in fact NOTHING at all!
Before I would be scared of my thoughts and make them bigger
and more important than they really are. But now they have to fit between my ears;
they lost kind of all their importance (read other blog).
Anyway, so Mama-P. asked me this insane weird question I would never EXCPECT coming out of her mouth…J “Which day are we?”
Anyway, so Mama-P. asked me this insane weird question I would never EXCPECT coming out of her mouth…J “Which day are we?”
My mind was…scanning …Monday….First day of the week…I was
looking for the date, which was a disaster; I didn’t have a clue…J
No that’s not it…J
DELETE
Mmm…my mind even thought, that it could be a ‘trick ‘question, as we would say in Belgium.
Hihi, my mind was now making this whole innocent question more important than it really was…
WELL, actually it was NOT so INNOCENT…J
No that’s not it…J
DELETE
Mmm…my mind even thought, that it could be a ‘trick ‘question, as we would say in Belgium.
Hihi, my mind was now making this whole innocent question more important than it really was…
WELL, actually it was NOT so INNOCENT…J
And ACTUALLY …VERY important, beeecause suddenly ‘my dollar’
fell down!(=Belgium expression to say that I understood in which direction the
whole thing was going)
SHIT…I said…I started laughing….I GOT IT!!!!!
The 22nd DAY!
“Ahum”, I hear at the other side of the telephone.
“And?”, she asks, “Are you ears still clogged up?”
“And?”, she asks, “Are you ears still clogged up?”
In my excitement of what happened with the dolphins, I forgot
my ears, really…J
“NO, NO…they are fine!!!!” I answered.
Again I hear;”Ahum.”
LOL
“NO, NO…they are fine!!!!” I answered.
Again I hear;”Ahum.”
LOL
We started laughing so hard…
She was right!
I felt better than ever after the 22nd day!
Yeah, yeah , yeah…a DANCE for Mama-P!
She was right!
I felt better than ever after the 22nd day!
Yeah, yeah , yeah…a DANCE for Mama-P!
I was still tired, but waaw…well…ok…I guess. haha.
I have to admit she was dawn rIGHT! S..t.
We just couldn’t stop laughing.
I had bet (lucky we didn’t bet for money) that I was going to be sick for 2 days and she had said 22 days, 22days for 22 years of self abuse. PFFFFT…
She has God on her side, she is unconditional LOVE…I am learning or she is teaching me to be UNCONDITIONAL LOVE…J
I have to admit she was dawn rIGHT! S..t.
We just couldn’t stop laughing.
I had bet (lucky we didn’t bet for money) that I was going to be sick for 2 days and she had said 22 days, 22days for 22 years of self abuse. PFFFFT…
She has God on her side, she is unconditional LOVE…I am learning or she is teaching me to be UNCONDITIONAL LOVE…J
We just had fun that it turned out to be ‘her’ 22 days and not 'my'2 days…
and I even had more fun the next morning when I arrived at my regular yoga spot on the lava.
On Sunday Mama-P. and her friend V. visited with me to see my yoga spot.
I adore making hearts for Mama-P. everywhere I can.
Underneath her heart I made was a text that somebody else made.
The text said;”Dovy WAS RIGHT!”
But the heart was lying so that it kind of was; “Mama-P. was right!”
and I even had more fun the next morning when I arrived at my regular yoga spot on the lava.
On Sunday Mama-P. and her friend V. visited with me to see my yoga spot.
I adore making hearts for Mama-P. everywhere I can.
Underneath her heart I made was a text that somebody else made.
The text said;”Dovy WAS RIGHT!”
But the heart was lying so that it kind of was; “Mama-P. was right!”
LOL
I LOVE to make hearts for Mama-P.!
Can you imagine how I feel?
In the beginning I always thought I was too much…sometimes I still have that…
But she accepts all what I give her…
I so love it!
I love to love her!
And she let me love her.
I love that.
It is for the first time in my life, I can love somebody that doesn’t say no to me.
(I know she would say now, that is because I don’t say NO to me anymore…J)
Can you imagine how I feel?
In the beginning I always thought I was too much…sometimes I still have that…
But she accepts all what I give her…
I so love it!
I love to love her!
And she let me love her.
I love that.
It is for the first time in my life, I can love somebody that doesn’t say no to me.
(I know she would say now, that is because I don’t say NO to me anymore…J)
She never tells me I am too much or too passionate or too intense!
That’s the word…intense…
It feels as if I can’t make any mistakes
or I can make all the mistakes I want and still she loves me.
She loves me unconditionally. It feels so safe.
It is one year ago I met her and since then my life changed RADICALLY
DRASTICALLY AMAZINGLY WONDERFULLY….
I was never as happy as now.
I was never so my true Self as now…J
I was never as happy as now.
I was never so my true Self as now…J
I feel so honored and I am ecstatically happy I can call her
Mama P., my mama.
And I know those are only roles and identities, but I just love it.
I can tell her everything and as a matter a fact I do. I can be totally me as I AM.And I know those are only roles and identities, but I just love it.
We are one in the ‘IAm’.
It all started with me, wanting a new teacher last year. The
very next day she showed up at the beach and it was as I was stroked by
lightening. I recognized her immediately. I was so clear.
I told her: “Waaw that was fast, you are my new teacher.”
Funny now to think about it, because it was as if she didn’t have a say in it…LOL…She probably laughs her ass off…right now…
And really, you know, what I just hear and feel…I didn’t have a say in it neither… J
I know deep in my heart that she is one of the reasons I travelled from Belgium all the way to Maui.
Lucky she was in Maui and not in Alaska.
I told her: “Waaw that was fast, you are my new teacher.”
Funny now to think about it, because it was as if she didn’t have a say in it…LOL…She probably laughs her ass off…right now…
And really, you know, what I just hear and feel…I didn’t have a say in it neither… J
I know deep in my heart that she is one of the reasons I travelled from Belgium all the way to Maui.
Lucky she was in Maui and not in Alaska.
Yep. Oef.
I just looked up the date when I first met her: 11/20/11.
J
J
I found my first email back I sent to her...
And one of the lines was:
I want to do your soulpainting, maybe I can have more teachings from Yoda then!
And one of the lines was:
I want to do your soulpainting, maybe I can have more teachings from Yoda then!
love Rainbow
Looking back now, I was BOLD and really I am NORMALLY not
bold…I was clear, I wanted her! I made her Yoda…me sky walker…LOL
When Mother day came I asked her if I could call her Mama . And she said yes.I, the daughter.
I was and am in the seventh heaven!(Belgian expression for being
very joyful!!!)
Now I made her Mama-p.-JI!
In India they give that title to honorable teachers…But really I came to see it is me who is moving up…maybe we move up together…J
In India they give that title to honorable teachers…But really I came to see it is me who is moving up…maybe we move up together…J
I lolololololololololololove her!
This is a painting I made during my sickness:
It
shows my turbulent but amazing change from the form of body/mind to more and
more “Iam’ reality.
It shows that I gave up all control…
I came to see that I never had control in the first place. It was a lie I believed.
I see now that all this time I was being lived…really…
I see that with my thoughts I can create a world of pain or a world of joy…
But more and more I experience that there is an outline to my life that is already in place and what I need to do is just showing up.
Trying to control things just overrides the peace and ease that is who I am.
Why not just surrender to the wonder of life in the knowing who I really am.
When that is in place I can play whatever I want, because I know that that is not me.|
I can enjoy life on Earth, enjoy my body, enjoy all what life brings me…
I came to see that I never had control in the first place. It was a lie I believed.
I see now that all this time I was being lived…really…
I see that with my thoughts I can create a world of pain or a world of joy…
But more and more I experience that there is an outline to my life that is already in place and what I need to do is just showing up.
Trying to control things just overrides the peace and ease that is who I am.
Why not just surrender to the wonder of life in the knowing who I really am.
When that is in place I can play whatever I want, because I know that that is not me.|
I can enjoy life on Earth, enjoy my body, enjoy all what life brings me…
Dolphins, turtles, Maui, joy, abundance, ME!, my friends, my
art, Mama-p.!
I am…
The day I realized to be thankful for bEING me…I could drop
me…and see that it was the easiest thing to do…LOVING ME!!!
Before it was a hard thing…I have to love me, I have to have
more self love…but when I dropped the me, I fell into who I really am: LOVE!!!
How difficult is to LOVE LOVE????
How difficult is to LOVE LOVE????
Thank you Mama-P. for all what you are in my life. Without
you I would not be who I am now.
I lolololololololove you! Very very much.
I lolololololololove you! Very very much.
I know sometimes words can't measure how I feel...and I can't put it in words...
but I
believe it is better to tell someone you love them, than to keep it to yourself.
So TODAY might be the day that you tell someone how much you love them!!!
Don’t hold back…go for it! You have my blessing…J
Now rest again...I feel good, but am aware that I am vulnurable...so rest rest REST...
So TODAY might be the day that you tell someone how much you love them!!!
Don’t hold back…go for it! You have my blessing…J
Now rest again...I feel good, but am aware that I am vulnurable...so rest rest REST...
Tamara rainbow
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