My new painting...Birth of being

 

 

Birth of being

Out of nothing
a splendor
yellow and orange,
purple and red…
the sun
gone

now…

NOW

I AM
aware

AWARE

vibration
essence
 being

Aware
I am
AWARENESS…

Hmmmm
delicious…

Relaxation….

I am
like
a child
in the arms
of the MOTHER.

I surrender
and trust…
THE MOTHER,

The mother
I AM
awareness
I AM…

I am
all of
that!

I am the mother,
the child…
the unborn
and
the born…

I am
awareness,
space
of
no death
and
no BIRTH.

I look with
an open heart
with NO mind…

I know

It is all nothing,
Nothing at all…

I am

Pure

awareness,
unchanging bliss.

 

I am
joyfully
pregnant…

For the
magic
of life
enfolding

Through me,
arising
out of me,
effortless
I allow
….

Rainbow

This painting is symbol for my own ‘birth’.
In a sense I never was born and will never die.
What I present here is that I, the awareness I am and always was, will always be…
I just came AWARE of it, that’s all…

It kind is my birth of being…


Love rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com

 

This painting is for sale.
It is 24 inch on 24 inch and costs $1495

I am free! A poem for Mamaji...

Gently…
 a warm breeze…
into my being…
It swirls
eternally
into the spaciousness
I AM.

The soft breeze
moving
through me…
A delicious way
of life.

The softness
of this dream life
appears
out of me…
delight
I see

Carpe diem
Dolce farniente

I rest
Allow
the life of dream
enfolding…
in the flow
of Grace.

Wide
open
alive
surrender
to the immenseness
of Grace.

Being supported,
Being lived,
being loved…

By
You,

YOU,
You are that Grace…

You,
You ARE Grace.

My imaginary box
falls open

Standing
the middle,
the center of my life,
I see…

I am space,
I am it all…
no walls to
contain
‘I’ anymore…
Limitless space
IAM>>

I am my dream life,
the warm breeze
Moving through
space
IAM…

My heart
wide open,
listening to your voice,
feeling your heart,
knowing your being.

Now,
the walls of my doubts
fell down…

I see
the lies
I once
believed.

YOU

YOU
show me
TRUTH,
YOU
show me
LOVE.
YOU
show me
GRACE…

Only

ONLY

because
I trust
YOU.

I am
FREE!

Thank you Mamaji

lololololololove YOU!
Rainbow

My new painting! called 'We are family!"

We are family!

An outburst of Joy
a deep knowing of belonging…

My heart wide open
My being
beaming through it…

I welcome YOU
with open arms
I am madly
IN LOVE!

My love!
My heart
beats faster
when I hear you!

My love!
My body shakes when
I see you.

I want to be with you,

Day and night!

When deep sleep comes
there you are again!

My beloved,
I am so crazy about
YOU!

Circles circles
spinning spinning
Talking talking

You turn around me
over and over
A never ending dance
of joyful bliss!

Singing singing
hugging hugging
kissing kissing

Your my heart is so wide open,
I feel you receive me,
I know you know
I receive YOU!

We are family!
You and me,
me and YOU.

We are family,
expressing
our eternal JOY.

We are family,
being one
in awareness!

Love kisses bubbles and joy
Joy love kisses and bubbles
Kisses love joy and bubbles

I can go on
Into the eternal
existence
we ARE

Together.

Thank you Thank you
Thank you!

 We are family,

Each one of you
falls into my heart
over and over...

One look in your eyes,
and I see the XTC
Of the love we share…

We are XTC!!!

My love!
I adore YOU!

This poem is written for the love of my life…
The dolphins!!!!
We have a love affair that has a never ending spacious existence…

Love, Rainbow

 

Please feel free to visit my website.
You can see a lot of my amazing art.
This painting is for sale and costs $850.
Give me a call…808-754-5883
www.rainbowsheart.com

This is my new painting! EFFORTLESS-NESS

I am intrigued lately to BE my true being. How can I not be?

All the stories I had before, addictions,…all the crap I was believing…a lot fell of me.
I see still some stuff, and now I am practicing…NOT to ignore it, but to see it, let it go and put my attention on who I truly am.

In that way I am starving the mind or the ego…
Oh yes, it kicks butt lately…fears come up…and when that happens I immediately feel a separation.
That is what we all feel when we are ruled by the mind and being ruled by the mind means that you believe what it makes up.

I am very happy, have lots of magic in my life…especially with dolphins and turtles…

The magic of finding  Mamaji in the right moment to teach me…BECAUSE I am sooooooooooo ready.

Yesterday she said about my thoughts;”When they come, just see them going by….in FAST motion!”

LOL

I know it starts…maybe being boring…that I have less and less to say. That I became more and more silent. My paintings lately are inspired by space and that’s how I feel…I feel spaciousness.

I AM awareness,
that what is there ALWAYS and never dies…that when our bodies leave this planet and or mind disappears remains UNCHANGED….

All is reduced in my life to or being the BEING or being the PERSON.

That’s it.

And really truth is WE ARE ALWAYS the being.

The one that kills at the other side of the world is not less 'being'
then a yogi who sits and prays for peace.
We are that…the actions we cause to do comes from believing our minds…

 

So BIRTH is always here…no need to WORK it, to travel to it, journey, climb mountains…

NO right here and now, recognize your own awareness and all the rest will just fall away…
bit by bit….

This painting is the pureness of our BEING….

The EFFORTLESSNESS in being that one…

The innocence and RELAXATION in the trust that all is well when you fall into that…
what we Are!

 

Love Rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com

This painting is for sale and costs $445

808=754-5883

My new painting IN THE DEPTH!

This is a new painting…

The story behind it is very simply.
You can see that the dolphins are moving towards a central point.
But in the same moment you see that they are the central point and all what IS.

The sky is their bodies and their bodies is the sky.

I realized today that I have a tendency…it is more then just tendency, it is a passion to paint DEPTH…
pronounced as depF…
only friends can understand this…it’s an inside joke, but as we are all one, you are my friend too…
As my body was born in Belgium, I learned to speak Flemish or Dutch…we DON”T use or tongue against or front teeth…so when I have to say something like ‘that’, ‘earth’,’mother’’depth’…

I still say it like thaD or earD or moDDer or depD…
The really VERY painful situation is when I have to say THIRD, then I say TURD…
I hear it coming now and so I start avoiding that word…LOL
And I have to say it a lot…every time somebody asks my birthday I say now three December, instead of December TURD….haha J

Anyway, that was a little intermezzo…
I adore to paint depth in my art…I always and always had that in my life, want to find the deepest point in me.
I want to meet God in me…
And you know what?

When I was meditating this morning I realized this…
I see the painting so the painting must be a creation of God, but behind that painting must be a subtler seeER...that one, the awareness itself...

That awareness is me...

Then this afternoon...

When I paint I always go backwards to see it for a few minutes on a distance…
I want that depth and the movement and it just has to feel right…My hands full of paint, my brush in my mouth...looking to my creation...

And in that moment of moving away I came finally in what I always wanted to paint…
tears of joy came over my face…
I was amazed and in a little shock by what I just had painted…
all in a good way…
I saw…
I saw that whatever I see at the outside is not me…
Is not God…and it is God...
What i mean is...my painting shall one day go....
God never goes!

God is me and is the one that SEES…
I was the seeER looking to what I have painted…
I was that depth, that space…
God just painted…
It felt that my body was just an instrument and I just downloaded the whole thing...

NO MIND anymore!

I felt that the painting was so beautiful, so pure and FULL of truth…
I felt I never painted so pure yet…
before I still had a mind that would interfere…
But lately I let more and more go of that and my pureness, the DEPTH that is within me is painting and all this ART comes to the surface lately…

The dolphins…when I am with the dolphins and I am connected with them, I am that pure depth too…
I am awareness, there where there is NO PAST, NO FUTURE…
NOW…
Only now…

There is not really a body then…
Yes they have their bodies and I have mine…But we are connected in awareness..
PURE LOVE shines through…

This is my new painting,
A God's creation...

 

It is for sale and costs $890
www.rainbowsheart.com

LOVE Rainbow

The story behind my new painting WONDER

This is a new painting!

 

As to explain the significance of it I want to share this:

this afternoon my body was so tired and I laid down, my legs were hurting and something really awesome happened. I could feel the pain but then suddenly I was the one inside my body. I could feel the energy circling, as my outside…that what you see my body was just a layer.

The pain was gone, I couldn’t really feel it any more.
I didn’t do any effort to have this experience.
When I was in the experience something in me wanted to feel my body and I could. I could switch from one to the other without effort.

I choose to go back to the inner state and a very intense vibration was going up and down kind of…
It felt so good that I was thankful for the experience of the pain, because it helped me to find this intense vibration that I recognized as my true self.
It felt as if I was an immense space right in my body…as if when I was inside I fell through my back, through the yoga mat, through the floor and I kept falling into space.

It was a safe sweet feeling, very gently, very free…

I fell asleep after that for a moment and when my body woke up, the pain was gone.

Another thing I want to share is the‘aha’ moment I had this morning. More and more I am falling into beingness and I kind of realized this morning this:

I talked to Mamaji yesterday and she told me that I can’t BE to want something.

Let’s take the example of being with dolphins. I can’t be that one to HAVE it…She explained that the point is to experience BEING it, than the rest is up to God to bring me the resonance of that experience.

So..this morning I looked to my life and I see Mamaji and dolphins and turtles and whales  and Maui and all my friends and all the blessings…and I realized that THAT WASN”T me…me the body Rainbow with her mind rainbow who could have brought that to me….
It was such a safe feeling to recognize that God gave me all of this in resonance of who I am BEING.

I could see that it even is embedded in my heart, my God’s heart…

I could feel that my heart desire is what matches with God’s desire.
Something like God’s will is my will, but then God’s heart is my heart…J

Or vice versa…

It gave me this safe feeling that the only thing I have to do is to follow my heart.
I love elephants, but I don’t really have that same feeling than when I see dolphins.
When I see dolphins my body starts shaking…very intense…
So that is probably why I am not in Zimbabwe playing with elephants or at the North pole swimming with pool bears…
Where my heart is is God…and when you be that heart’s desire that’s when you are in tune with your own very being…I found it a very very safe feeling…

My heart longed for a teacher and there she was on the beach…
I told her that and she said that’s where all teachers should hang out…J

She is my biggest gift of all!

And listening to Mooji this afternoon explained me even better why I feel that way.
He says that you end up or find his satsangs because something in you is ready to know the truth.

YOUR HEART IS READY…

That heart desire brought me Mamaji…how cool is that!

In this last year, with the help of Mamaji and Moojiji I came in to IAM.

During all this time I have let go of most everything I identified with…

I feel I am there in that space of my painting.
IAM…

I am pure awareness and my world of dolphins and whales arises in it.

I am the body that comes and goes…

I am awareness…

I am challenged though, I feel I am…my mind is giving its last offensive to …
(well I hope it is the last one…it keeps on being the last one, I guess that is my mind too…J letting me believe this kind of shit!)
Yes, its last offensive, and to do what?
Give up?
I can’t give up…no BODY can ever give up…
Because we are NO BODY…we are awareness…there is nothing to give up…

We are it…nothing can change that…
that is the ONLY UNCHANGING fact that we have in life, all, the rest comes and goes…J
Letting the mind go is where we all have to go through…is it not now being alive, it is when you will leave this body and planet…

And some point we have to let go and realize we NEVER had CONTROL ever…

That is the painting….

The realization we are space.
And WE ARE LIVED…
In the painting

IAM
Out of my mind…
I
lost my mind…

I did see today that it is not only required from me to let go and let God,
I also have one responsibility…

And that is to use my ATTENTION to stay in the IAM<

It is the game of being on Earth…pronounced EartF….LOL
J

Namaste,(as Byron Katie would say for the word Namaste-NO MISTAKE…)
I love it!

Love, Rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com

The story behind my new painting SPACE

This is my new painting!

It symbolizes the urge, the longing to be who IAM.
I can’t say become, because I am already it.

It is the courage to let my existence over to existence and knowing that I fall into the unknown.
We..or maybe I have to speak out of me, I am scared of the unknown. I want to know beforehand what’s going to happen etc…I sense a lot of control. I want to have my life under control.
But I know deep inside that that is not possible.
We are never in control, we think we are. But we aren’t.

Coming to realization of that, is coming to the point to die to that lie.
Am I who they taught me I am? This body, this mind?
Who am I when I die?
I started the journey with asking for a teacher and there I found Mamaji on the beach…J

A bit longer than a year ‘playing’ together and I came to the experience that I am that SPACE.

I am the unknown.

There is nothing I know…maybe I do know in my heart that I am pure awareness and that when I am there in that space of nothingness I am everything.

When I fall into IAM, my pure self I am connected to ALL what IS.
Is that the UNKNOWN?
Is that where I am afraid of?
How can I be afraid of what I am?
How can I be afraid of being everything?

I experienced we are not the ones in control…

Awareness we are, or I am and that awareness is God…

It is in the resonance with that awareness that I am in tune with the highest symphony of life.
I am not the creator…
I just learned that.
Mamaji must have told me that a thousand times, but I kind of got it yesterday deeply.
I still had a thought I needed to CREATE my life…

NO I have to BE my life… or be and life enfolds…
GIVING MY EXISTENCE TO EXISTENCE…J


Being instead of doing=creating…

Letting go and letting God…

I do have those desires that  I want to be the one swimming with dolphins or I want to be the one this or that…

But maybe at some point…
And I am at that point I believe…
I will have to be the one that says:”I want to be the one free within my PURE SELF, AWARENESS…”

And let all the rest go and trust that what resonates with my being will resonate with me…

The dolphin in my painting is in pure resonance with who he is…
He is me…
And I am him,
we are pure awareness!

The story behind my new painting Out of THIS!

This is my new painting….

Do you hear the silence of my being?
Do you see the greatness of my being?

It is the same silence and greatness that is within you!!!

 

OUT OF THIS…

This painting is made with the attention of who I truly am…

It is that space that Mamaji, my dearest mom, teacher held for me all this time…
The love I have for her is so immense…she always told me that I am only loving me through her…
And I see now that she was RIGHT again!
I am her…we are awareness…love itself…
The trust I have for her is painted in this painting…
I have met her more than a year ago and step for step I let go more and more of my ego- identities…
with her as my support…my safety…I trusted her completely…Eventhough my mind sometimes told me I was crazy, I fell more and more into Mamaji!

I didn’t know then what I know now…
And that is that the safety I felt in her…was exactly THAT where I had to FALL INTO!!!!
She is the painting, the space you see I painted here…she is that…
I am that…J
You see a whales eye in the right corner slightly…it’s the whales’ enormous energy of greatness that holds that safety too…When you see a whale again, know that they are holding us in their spacious beings…in safety…in a warm embrace of pure unconditional love…
(haha feels as if i compared Mamaji with a whale..LOL)

 

Out of this…
Emptiness... comes the fullness…
Out of this…
Center ...comes the truth…
Out of this…
Love ...comes the joy

Out of this…
awareness, awareness…
Out of this…

I AM

IAM..

Out of this…
space ...comes our existence
Out of this…
wholeness ...comes our uniqueness
Out of this…
silence ...comes my /our voice

Do you hear?
Do you listen?

Out of this
awareness…
Out of this

Comes...
Comes my joy…

Out of this…

comes
YOU!

Out of love
Out of truth
Out of patience
Out of trust
Out of YOU

YOU
YOU

comes me!

I AM!

Thank you Mamaji…LOLOLolololove you!

 

(Inspired by the song Out of this by Autamata)

Love Rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com

Relax! How do i do that?

Oh boy,
it goes fast lately in moving into more and more awareness.

It is more that things fall of me, and the one I truly am remains…

I don’t do anything for it, realizations just happen in the moment and more and more space comes into my life.

Kind of the this image:
when I was born I was awareness in a body…
than I started picking up beliefs and truths of the outside world…
parents, school, society…you name it…
It is as if my being was wrapped in bondage and became a mummy, that couldn’t see the truth anymore.
Today I see that life itself, awareness is unwrapping me…
In sending me Mamaji and Moojiji on my path…
It feels like the more I listen, the more I see truth and the faster I turn in a swirl and get UN-BONDAGED…or un-wrapped…

I never was so clear in my whole life and it feels that I got rid of a lot of those beliefs…

Today again I had a major seeing and it was amazing..
Trust or no trust in the Universe…

It really doesn’t matter.

If we are awareness we don’t need to trust anything.

Awareness itself is seeing the movement of trust…

I could see that during my life the Universe always took care of me.
In a way when we are awareness, we are lived and if you ignore the mind AND  stay in the IAM…
life will do a better job than the mind can.
We have a free will, I can stay in the mind if I want…You can too…
And live the life of loss, separation, pain and sadness…
We can…
Or we can just be US…

Today I saw how much pain staying in the mind had brought me…
I told you about the farm yesterday. I worked there, but I was very unhappy.
I disliked it in fact, but my mind thought that was I needed to do to survive.
I was a slave of my own thoughts with staying in that situation.

Saying NO two days ago…(read my previous blog)…thank you my ears!

IS a true liberation…

Since I said NO, such much awareness came my way…
I remembered again how abusive it was, really.
And how abusive I was to myself…
But I could also see that the Universe, although it pushed and pulled me for about a year TO GET OUT…

And my mind kept me there in fear…

Took care of me….

Trust or NO trust…
the Universe took care of me…

And the funny thing was that I realized today that it was my father that came from Belgium to bring me back to my true SELF.

Before that time my relationship was ‘no good’ with him…
But after that miracles happened between us…
It was insane now to see that the Universe send him to get me out of there…that is pretty cool…
Thank you dad! Thank you God!


And then a bigger awareness came, because I could see during my life how the Universe always has been taking care of me…

And that parent ‘bad’ situations are not bad at all….

in the seeing of my father helping me, I could see that when he 20 years ago kind of…whatever he did…

It doesn’t really matter…in my mind it was something ‘bad’.
But today, I could see that the action of him in Hawaii and the action of him 20 years ago, wasn’t different…One was not a good action and the other a bad action…
It were just actions…no judgment in AWARENESS!

In the place where I am now…it is all love…
My dad is who I am…
Actions don’t matter…J
and the woman that had abusive tendencies on the farm, she had loving tendencies too…
And now I can see that she is no different…
She is awareness…
I believe that I just figured out how to truly forgive…

haha
Forgiveness doesn’t exist…
because we are not the body and not the mind, actions are happening in the world of bodies and minds…
In awareness everything is LOVE….

So…

Now I start understanding when Mamaji says RELAX…
I fall into awareness and there is only relaxation…
I even had a very deep experience this afternoon, really…about relaxation…
I lay on my bed and it was as if I was falling through my body…it kind of dissipated and the bed was there the whole time as support, but it was not really there…it was as if I was floating in space…
I was really letting go of my body…not intentionally…it just all happened… felt so relaxed…

The bed felt as symbol of the trust we don’t NEED to have in the Universe…
because trust or no trust we are supported, always…

We fall into our selves…

I relax,

and I see that my bondages (i hope that is the right word for those white bandages around a mummy...:)) became swirling scarves in the sweet warm breeze while I am dancing INTO the IAM..
relaxing in fhe space of freedom.....

Love Rainbow

www.rainbowsheart.com

My ears make me listen!

 

I entered a space I never entered before in my life and you know …while I am writing this I realize that that is the biggest lie I can write down.
I am that space; the space I entered…
the one I truly am…

I am…
All what I was before I was not....

That my mind goes crazy…oh yes…but it is losing more and more its power…
It is as if I moved into a SPONTANEOUS EXCISTENCE…more and more…

I am not much in the past and a future, I know , I don’t have anyway.

If my mind tries to let me believe something…it advocates, does anything to get my attention…
As a child that can only get attention with bad behavior…Demanding sometimes...J
Anyway if it comes up with stuff, it is always or from the past or future that doesn’t exist.
LOL
I am now trained already by life to focus my attention on the IAM, instead of my fearful mind…

When I am in the now my life is so abundant, so delicious filled with so much love…
Dolphins, turtles, whales, friends, my art, the birds in the trees, the flowers, Maui,..

and me as the I.

The I AM..especially that, only that really....

My ears are helping me to stay where I am.
It is really trippy to see that.

Twice this week… or even more…

I had a few situations where I had to make a choice…

Oh yes, sorry… I have an ear infections in both ears for now about 2 weeks.

My house smells to a very good Italian cuisine.
And funny is that that cuisine goes where ever I go.
I smell it in my car, on the street, on the beach,…where ever I go There I am…Haha!

FULL of garlic aroma…

I am like a walking garlic bomb…
I probably could cook some spaghetti in my ears with all the garlic and olive oil I have put in there.
That was the remedy I found on YouTube and I must say ,it works!

BUT

 

It only works when I am true to myself.

When I am not, instantly my ears go in protest and shut down.

It is as if I get a disconnection. That’s how it feels. It is as if my ears and especially the space between my ears…haha… there where the mind lives…
Well, WE think it is there, in actuality it is NOTHING…it is just a little space between my ears.

But it is trippy, when I make a decision that is not in alignment with what I WANT and lOVE, my ears immediately start hurting and get infected again…
It doesn’t take hours, just a few minutes and bang…I am kind of deaf…J
literally and figurative…J
Also instantly I lose my life force…
And it not only happens with situations where I have to make decisions at the outside.

What I mean by that…I’ll give an example…
Somebody emailed me and asked me if I could help on her farm. My first reaction was yes, I always want to help where I can.

But 3 seconds after I sent that email, my ears started hurting so much, I lost my life force in even less than 3 seconds…I had to lay down.

I knew immediately I couldn’t do it.
I was still struggling at first because I said yes...but the longer I waited to correct my error the sicker i came...
I really can’t do anything anymore that would compromise my being.

The moment I emailed back, I got very fast healthy again…

Waaw…I have an inner compass…my ears.
That happens when you not always listen to your intuition...then my IAM has to use more louder signals...:)

But this afternoon, I didn’t have a decision to make in an outside kind of situation, but an inside one…
As a matter a fact the outside situations are the inside ones of course…
There is nothing outside of us.
We are space where everything arises…

But I just try to get the idea over…

My mind was trying to make me believe something that was taking me away of who I really am.
It was about the future and of course it was worry and fear…
I went with it for about 10 minutes and instantly the garlic and olive oil in my ears started cooking…LOL

I got it again…Life force gone…

DEAF….
As my core doesn’t want me to listen anymore to the bullshit my mind is preaching…J
I made correction and life force back…ears cleared out….

For me it is my ears…for you it can be another body part calling your attention….just listen…
and actually no body parts involved if we just go with our intuition...:)

it is very symbolic that my IAM does it through my ears though…
It is really time for me to only listen to the AWARENESS IAM,
I am ready to live my life in the space IAM…

When I listen to that space, I only hear silence…
I hear the heartbeat of the Universe.
I hear the heart beat of us all.
We are all that space,

The undying emptiness that is EVERYTHING….

I am listening…
Out of this..
OUT OF THIS…

IAM…

I hear the dolphins’ joy,
I hear the whales’ song,
I hear the peace of the turtles,
I hear the love of Mamaji,
I hear my the heart of my art beating,
I hear the freedom in a birds’ whistle,
I hear the crashing wave coming and going,

I hear my breath,

I hear my presence,

I hear my gratitude for life…

Living life the way I feel it,
living life through the God’s desire in my heart,
dedicated to that inner awareness,
That what I am,
that is the greatest gratitude I can show
God, life, awareness…

than garlic is only a taste of 'carpe diem',
not a a sort of medicine to eliminate 'evil' energies...

 

Love Rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com

the story behind my NEW painting! Let it OUT!

 

 

 

This is a new painting….

It says a lot of what is happening with me right now…I am kind of speechless…

My ego is dying…I feel I am sitting in the desert…the 40 days…and I am dying and collapsing within and I am seeing I am not my body nor my mind…I see that all is NOTHING….
I AM…
I see that inside of me….where I am falling into…is space…
As I am falling I see that ALL is that same space…
And then I understand in a deep knowing that that one…

That space where I am falling into…
that one is the See-er of it all…
that is what can NOT be seen…that space…
And I am falling…
and know
I am THAT…
It is in GOD I fall…

God is falling into me…
I am God…

 

My mind and body are in fear…huge fear, because they are going through thefaze of dying…
I am not waiting , not compromising until my body really will die…
because that is what we know, we all will go there…
In that moment when our body dies, there is NO HOPE for control…
I want to do it NOW…
I want to drop the fear…
Have the courage of the LION…
To GO and dance within as the DANCER does in my painting….
The dancer swirls into the perfect geometric symbol of GOD…
I painted this symbol as perfect synchronicity, perfect…perfect…GOD…you get me, right?
And then I really mean letting go and allowing existence to LIVE through you…
TO BE ALIVE , truly alive into the SPACE of awareness…

There where there is no attachment…to nothing that is NOTHING…lol
There you know and see that THOUGHTS come and GO…
And when you say that within yourself…
Listen…
Thoughts come,
thoughts go…
the space that comes available between the coming and going…
that is the IAm, the awareness that we are!

That is the space of truth…

My body is breaking out in all sorts of things…It is purging, eliminating…
I love my body, it is strong and innocent, so sweet and so sacred…
My mind trembles in fear..it feels the end is near and it tries to bring me back into the control of a compromised life…it’s just an innocent child too…
But the I am I became, with the support of Mamaji…that one came so much more stronger…
That one is the true self…

I can see what fear does to us…what the mind does to us…just turn on the radio, the news..anything and you know…that is the game of the mind…
In my life it turns in ear infections, and break outs…it is my fear that INFECTS my body…the fear as a YEAST entering….slowing the system down…
And funny enough my computer crashed yesterday because a virus took CONTROL…
I knew immediately that this was the result of my fear…it taught me that I have CHOICE…
Mamaji tells me that already for months, but I guess I have to live it…
It feels like when Jesus (I am not comparing myself with this great master, it just feels like the same situation right now)sitting in the desert approached by Satan…

THERE IS THE CHOICE!!!!

Do you overcome your mind(Satan) or d….DO I OVERCOME MY MIND or…
YES!!!!

I WANT!!!

My computer…I knew I had let my mind take over…today I chatted with a computer guy and for me it was amazing…I was in awe…how he…from somewhere on the mainland came in my computer and worked, eliminated that virus out….out…out…
It was tripy...it was as if he was sitting in my computer...or invisible sitting on my lab working on my keybord...REALLY trippy!!!!
I saw my cursor going back and forward, 20 different programs open closing…clicking everywhere…
Long messages, language i didn't understand one little bit of it...
Oh boy!
I was so amazed!
I even started painting next to my computer, while the computer genius fixed the problem...
It is worth having a virus to just see this wonder happening…
Inside of me…the same was happening…
ARE YOU GOING TO LET THE MIND RULE and FEAR?
Or really eliminate it ouT OUT OUT?

Every time again and again by seeing through it and let it pass as clouds in your sky…
Let it out!

No resistance…just awareness…
Just that what we ARE>>>

That is the choice I have…
At the level of my life here in this body….

I am the artist…I want to be the artist...

There I don’t want to compromise anymore neither…and be TRUE to myself…
Being true to what I really want…living this life with such aliveness…

I am being the dolphin, turtle, whale LOVER...

Giving myself the GIFT of TRUE life…

Being my OWN true lOVER....

and not waiting until this body dies…
NOW I say YES…

…I SAY YES….courage…YES...as the LIon and the dancer say YES!
I say YES to awareness and YES to a joyFULL life on earth as awareness…awareness…

I am not always so courageous as now, you know…sometimes I cry…
but then I try to LOOK and do the 3,2,1 drop …groud ZERO (a Mooji trick)
or I say as Mamaji…IT IS NOTHING…or FORGET ABOUT IT…it's just a STORY!!!
and FALL into who I truly am…and there is NO FEAR>…
NO-THING and EVERY-THING

:)
Love Rainbow
www.rainbowsheart.com